For those of you who don’t know this, being gay at work can be an occupational hazard.
From soft bigotry in the hiring process to outright hostility towards individual colleagues, I’ve dealt with workplace incivility towards gay people on a consistent basis since 1995. For chrissake, I was dealing with issues of bullying and insensitivity until the day I walked out the door of my last HR job. I can’t tell you how many wasted hours were spent counseling employees who thought it was okay to make snide comments. I can’t tell you how many leaders I’ve worked with who thought it was okay to dole out overtime and project assignments based on perceived notions of sexual preferences.
So when I tell you that we need ENDA — the federal Employee Non-Discrimination Act — I mean that we need it yesterday. According to Workforce Magazine, the federal act would prevent discrimination and would cover hiring, firing, promotion or compensation decisions, according to the gay advocacy group the Human Rights Campaign.
Now some small business owners and conservative Christians feel that the government has no right to dictate the rules of employment. Those people are so wrong that it hurts my face. Unchecked power at any level is dangerous, and if companies can discriminate against one group (the gays), they will find a way to continue discriminating against other groups (women, African Americans, Christians) in soft, subtle, and dangerous ways.
I am a capitalist. I believe in personal freedom. You want to discriminate against someone in the privacy of your home? Go for it. But the minute you use commerce as a weapon to hurt and exclude a group of citizens, your actions are part of a broader public policy debate about money and power. And if ENDA passes, it will be both immoral and illegal to inject sexual orientation into the employer/employee covenant.
Dare we dream, people. Dare we freakin’ dream.
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Thanks for writing this Laurie.
Amen, hallelujah, pass the peas.
ur welcome amanda.
Gay discrimination is really the last major right’s abuse that deserves government protection. With the Civil Rights Act, it became a federal offense for employers to discriminate based on race, color, religion, national origin, or sex. Numerous laws later and we now cover age, disability, equal pay and even genetic information. It’s all there on the EEOC website.
But for whatever reason, gays have been a punch-bag favorite of politicians. From the denial of marriage, or at the very least civil unions, and then instituting a policy that enforced systematic deceit in the military, gays do not curry favor in Washington. It took a lameduck session of Congress and a three hundred billion dollar fiscal hole to convince the bigots of the Capitol to bring about a cessation of having to lie for one’s country. Gays have to beg to be brought to the same level as every one else. It’s sick.
The workplace ought to be on equal ground for all. Yes discrimination still occurs to all classes of people. But they have recourse. They have a system in place that attempts to protect them. They can go after the employer through public humiliation, fines, monetary compensation, or some other means. Gays have no recourse. It’s pathetic. Unacceptable.
This must stop. It stops with ENDA.
Thanks, Luke. Very compelling comment.
Yes to this.
ENDA is going to change the game, in a lot of ways.
Hopefully GLB(and T, if they’re included) employees will drop the blind loyalty to any company where they’re treated kind-of like humans.
Hopefully we won’t continue to get stuck in dead-end, non-customer-facing jobs because, “the client might not feel comfortable with us.”
And hey! Maybe we can eventually stop the federally-mandated lies on our income tax statements that we’re all, “Single.” Or even stop paying extra taxes on our dependent health care coverage.
ENDA is important, because financial freedom is important. And working in a workplace that doesn’t suck helps us to make a deeper contribution to the bottom line of the company. But we can’t make that deep contribution if we’re constantly looking over our shoulders or dealing with social/political/discriminatory distractions that have nothing to do with how effective we are on the job.
Franny your comment is so simple & clear. Thank you.
I could wax poetic about this all day, but I’ll keep it short and to the point…homophobes suck, period. I’ll save my soapbox speech for another day-my facebook friends have seen enough of it, I’m sure!
thanks, laurie
For those people who don’t think Gays should be out at work. I want you to try this. Take down all the photo’s of your family from your desk and computer. Remove your wedding ring and don’t talk about your husband/wife or kids to anyone. Do *nothing* to publicly acknowledge your heterosexuality to any of your coworkers. Try this for 30 days and see how weird and unnecessary it feels.
Straight people forget they advertise their sexuality *all the time* (nothing screams that your getting busy like getting pregnant), and never worry about getting fired over it.
I shouldn’t stay in the closet just so you can keep enjoying your privilege.
And to awesome people like Laurie who support us. I thank you.
Thanks, geo. So poignant.
An acquaintance of mine told me that the votes against allowing gays to marry were clear proof that the American people aren’t ready for this. To which I replied; I don’t see this any differently than the civil rights issues from the 60′s. People weren’t allowed to vote to keep discriminating against people based on their race or skin color, the government just made it illegal and told them they had to stop because it’s wrong.
People should all have the same rights no matter what their lifestyle is, especially because being gay doesn’t hurt anyone else or infringe on anyone else’s rights. The government should just say it’s illegal to discriminate and we need to stop.
Thank you for bringing up this issue Laurie!
Thanks, Darcy. Great & honest comment!
As a gay man, it sucks to be in a work environment that is hostile to you. You worry about everything except your work. What good is that for my employer?
It’s not. Well said, jay.
I can only tell you from a male point of view being around men at lunch and at smokers row. Some men are very resentful toward gay men. The perception is that they can and will be promoted first because they are non threatening. I have heard this from frontline employees all the way up to management level employees. I can tell you as a miniority I am always ultra senitive to any discrimination because I think about Dr. King preaching acceptance and to be judged but the character. It’s such a shame when we allow our person basis to distort our ability to work together.
thanks newresource. that’s a good comment, too.
You want to discriminate against someone in the privacy of your home? Go for it. But the minute you use commerce as a weapon to hurt and exclude a group of citizens, your actions are part of a broader public policy debate about money and power.
Yes, yes, and yes. This is it in a nutshell.
And it pertains not only to LGBT employees but any employee who may fall under the “diversity” umbrella. As one of my favorite bosses once said: My bias is merit. I intend completely to discriminate on merit and only hire people who have it.
That should be the only bias. We’re not there yet. Not for women, or people of color, or any non-WASP people. I don’t have a huge wellspring of hope for myself as an LGBT employee when there’s still an element of “Patel? Oh, that name is too weird/odd/difficult to remember, I’m just going to call you Pete” at many companies.
From my own personal POV, if you have to worry about what I do behind closed doors you must be incredibly BORED. In which case, let me find you some more work to do…..
wait, please, let me obsess with the sex that i THINK you are having… i have nothing else to do with my time.
Right on! First, the government already regulates the workplace – from determining minimum wages to determining how long an individual can work – going another step to say you “can’t” discriminate makes sense. Going further, isn’t this stuff in the constitution??? “Pursuit of life, liberty…” Second, diversity strengthens the workforce and increases productivity, as long as we have leaders and managers that can “handle” the diversity.
thanks, mike. well put.
It boggles my mind that so many people don’t understand that discriminating against one group only bleeds to discrimination against others. If we don’t ALL have equal rights under the law, then we’re all at risk, straight white males included!
The far right is already blaming women for our economic instability, so what makes anybody think that the opposition to equal rights for gays isn’t yet another step in their campaign to send us all back to the 1950′s? Actually, worse than that. They want to send us into some abyss where one has to fit a very narrow mold of wealthy, white, male, and “Christian” (whether they practice what they preach or not).
I like to blame people. Really. That’s fun for me. But blaming people for economic instability? stupid.
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/11/nyregion/11sexchange.html
Just thought I’d insert this interesting case highlighting the the “T” in GLBT. I’m very curious how it will turn out.
Incidentally, a colleague once recommended me to be on our company’s committee to choose the new office carpeting—seemingly for no reason other than my “festive” design sense. “Vadim would be good at this,” she’d emailed. Not exactly discrimination, but definitely a bit of stereotyping. Nonetheless, I wasn’t offended by the comment. I was more perturbed by the thought of wasting time deciding between Gray #345 or Gray #346.
Dang — that T has some controversy.
“Those people are so wrong that it hurts my face.” —- I will use that one in the future. I can’t say that I disagree with your point of view on this topic but I see discrimination as a bad business decision as well. If you are avoiding the best talent because you have some preconceived notion about their color or sexual orientation then send those candidates to me. So, aside from a political or religious point of view, it doesn’t make economic or business sense to discriminate. From a business perspective why wouldn’t you take the person that offers you the best chance for success? I really don’t believe another law is needed to address this but adding this group to Title VII is probably an appropriate measure, as this is a group that gets ridiculed without thought by many. That being said, where do we stop with laws protecting people classed in a certain way shouldn’t we just stop classifying people?
Somehow we need to continue to enhance the understanding and work on changing the behavior just like we have with other similar discriminatory and harassing practices. It amazes me that in this chosen career of HR that I still deal with sexual harassment and discrimination on a regular basis. How long have we been training people on these topics and diversity in general and how many laws address it? It is clearly education that best addresses the issue.
dwood,
Perfectly said.
Thanks, dwood. Education and maybe some yelling. I dunno.
I am a Christian and I do not in any way support discrimination of gays. I also support civil unions. I think that’s what we ought to call all legal commitments (heterosexual and homosexual). I believe so much in separation of church and state and in covenant marriage that I believe Christians are totally missing the point. Let whatever adults want to enter into civil unions go to the courthouse and do so. And let those who are religious go to their houses of worship to be married in the way that their religion deems appropriate. Why or why can’t we figure out how to separate the two?
Thanks for this post, Laurie. I’m with dwood92 — perhaps an addition to Title VII is more appropriate than another law — but the end result should be the same.
And you statement below should be shouted from the mountaintops.
“But the minute you use commerce as a weapon to hurt and exclude a group of citizens, your actions are part of a broader public policy debate about money and power.”
Thanks for the thoughtful comment TN.
As a nearing 60 (can’t get my head around that) Lesbian, I can tell you I have seen the entire range of workplace nonsense on LGBT issues. From people who made it clear that their religion objected to my existence or deemed me as asking for “special rights” to being encouraged to go back in the closet in order to avoid problems as I climbed the management ranks. ENDA is necessary and long overdue.
We need such protections to ensure that the primary criteria for hiring, firing, promotions, and compensation are established on an even playing field. It’s not only the right thing to do (something increasingly edged out by self serving political interests) it makes good business sense.
Thanks for joining in my “freakin’ dream!”
I love that freakin dream. And you are 60 going on awesome.
“…soft, subtle and dangerous”. Yes! Flawless thinking. It’s time to end discrimination, in all forms.
i’m ready.
being gay is one thing- you may face some discrimination, but not so much in creative jobs in blue states.
being poor on the other hand….that will get you shunned everywhere.
“at-will” employment is riddled with problems, but it’s not absolute. Of course, anyone with any sense at all will never give an explicit reason for a no-hire/fire decision……
and the “Supreme” 5-4 court we have today will never protect any individual from any powerful interest……
what if you’re gay? poor? black? and part puerto rican? with a splash of irish? and you have a disability? that fucking supreme court is out to get you.
Thanks for writing this Laurie – I had no idea such legislation was still missing in the US.
james, we are assholes. #fact
Thank you, Laurie.
thanks, brian.
Again, thank you Laurie for writing the truth and a healthy perspective. I absolutely agree with you and I wish more people had these same views.
thanks, megan.
Can regulatory standards truly curb a discriminatory culture (especially if subtle or imperceivable)? These acts have had success before yet I am sceptical about regulations changing hegemonic power structures.
I don’t know if it can curb it — but it can penalize it.
Even if every company vows to never discriminate and ENDA passes, there’s still the “gay tax” that prevents full workplace equality. Same-sex couples are taxed on their partner’s health benefits while opposite-sex couples are not. DOMA prevents federal recognition of marriage so the government taxes same-sex couples’ health insurance as INCOME. Companies like Google compensate their gay employees for this when applicable.
So true.
You can’t legislate civility. They will just save money to defend their incivility, like a pro football line backer saves a couple hundred large for illegal hit fines. Or am I cynical?
Bravo Laurie! I was reading about this last week and I was appalled to learn that there are still states that don’t have laws against this type of discrimination. A day doesn’t go by lately that I don’t wonder about the state of affairs in this country. (Of course, I am in Wisconsin too.) We are regressing into the dark ages. I guess since American didn’t go through it the first time – well I’m sure it did but we don’t know what happened during it – we have to go through it now. The inquisition will be starting any day now.
Brava, Laurie AND same to the nearing 60 lesbian – WritingInside! Being in that same nearing 60 lesbian group, I also want to add that the older I get – the more prone I am to becoming The Thing They Don’t Want to Deal With as publicly as possible.
In my age group, we have seen alot: from the genesis of the gay rights movement (ok – the free-wheeling 1920-s when everyone did everyone and everything without apology was a bit related, but not the same) up to the current better-but-still-not-satisfactory state of affairs.
We know people who were murdered, jailed, ridiculed, ostracized, fired, put on “lists”, denied medical care – and, as recently as the last year – denied access to their loved one before dying in the hospital. It wasn’t until DECADES later that the gent who cracked the Nazi cypher code was afforded apology (posthumously) by the Brits who threw him out of the service and jailed him for being gay.
Yeah – everytime I thank my lucky stars that ‘things are way better now’ – I get hit with a jolt like that. So – everytime I see an opportunity to make someone a little uncomfortable with my outed-ness, I snag it. My nom de plum is not a reflection of being in the closet about being a lesbian. It’s because I don’t know who reads my sophomoric comments about doing HR.!….
Join me and just “live” ENDA until it actually becomes reality, please. Act as if you already HAVE those rights, those benefits and just demand them whenever you can. Someone wrote that you can’t legislate sentiment. I agree. You also need to stand up and be a pain in the ass once in a while – when it’s worth it. Read ANYthing by the late Quentin Crisp to help motivate yourself
I worked for Labreque Family Chiropractic as their office manager and it turns out they were a “faith based” establishment and when it was found out that I was gay….I am sure some of you are snickering because how long did it take them to figure that one out? Anyways they found out and Dr. Jim Labraque pulled me in and told me “just because you are living the wrong lifestyle does not mean you won’t be good at this job” I was totally shocked. It made me feel completely uncomfortable and I felt I had to leave.
Federal protection for sexual orientation is long over due.
What if two males and one female want to marry? Is that okay? How about three men? Should Hooters be forced to hire a 6’5″ tall 210 lb transgenger who wants to be a Hooters girl? How about the gay and lesbian task force? Would they hire a devout Christian who was more than qualified needed the job but didn’t agree with their “mission”. Just because you start your own business doesn’t mean you give up your rights to hire employees that represent your company philosophy or image. Should a day care company be forced to hire a cross dresser?
I have many close friends and relatives that are gay and I would hire them in a heartbeat but I do not believe a private company should be forced to hire anyone. You always have the option to start your own business rather than forcing someone else who did to hire you.
Just because you start your own business doesn’t mean you give up your rights to hire employees that represent your company philosophy or image. Should a day care company be forced to hire a cross dresser?
Actually you do when your philosophy or mission violates interstate commerce clauses or many of the other regulations that apply to the workforce.
I have many close friends and relatives that are gay and I would hire them in a heartbeat but I do not believe a private company should be forced to hire anyone. You always have the option to start your own business rather than forcing someone else who did to hire you.
This comment demonstrates a really poor understanding of capitalism and how the world works. And this comment shows me that you don’t know how money is made and how opportunities materialize & exist in America. You can disagree with me, but please don’t be so naive on my blog. There’s no place for these old, outmoded, discredited arguments about capitalism. Go elsewhere with this. Thank you.
More advice from someone who has never actually started a business with more than herself as an employee and who’s career has been as an employee. Don’t try to tell those that have created companies what you know nothing about.
I love the passion you have for protecting individuals from the harm that can be done in a work place. The employer/owner of an organization can be biased, the managers can be biased, but the HR department in most cases is unbiased. This makes me proud to say that we are unbiased HR professionals and protecting the employees is our main responsibility.
Scenario: you work in a small company, you are practically the only HR person, and everyone else disagrees with your decisions on changing the current work environment that everyone else seems to enjoy so much. A hand full of gay employees work in the company, but there is constant homophobic jokes/slurs being thrown in all professional environments within the organization. How do you “professionally” fight back? How do you change the views of these awful people when the owners are one of them? Since there would be no support from the organization to help you out, I think ENDA would be something an HR professional can fight back with. This bill can help one person have full support from the whole government! The owner can get in serious trouble from an HR professional who speaks out. That way, companies can fear an HR professional if their culture practices a drop of homophobia/racism. This bill can paint a whole new face for the HR world. Second guessing or doubting the HR department can become rare in all kinds of companies. But will our ex. backward thinking President continue to disagree?
It kills me that such situations still exist! People still think it’s completely appropriate to put someone down within/away from a workplace just because they are different? And passing a bill can stop such people? Why not pass it ASAP!? This can change the HR world forever, which can also change the way companies are formed/managed.
Very heated topic. I am not sure why people are afraid of differences. The differences actually make work and life fun and interesting. When we hate or discriminate we stop learning. Period.
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