I am a failed fiction writer.
I am comfortable with my status as a pathetic writer because I’ve done everything to improve my skills.
- Online Seminars
I will never write a decent story because I always put myself into the narrative — even when I don’t belong. Unfortunately, I can’t write a story or create a character that isn’t shamelessly linked to my life. It’s not fiction when it’s about me. It’s therapy, or more specifically, blogging — which is why Punk Rock HR fills such an important role in my life.
There was a particular moment, several years, ago, when I realized that I was a bad fiction writer. I wrote a short story that involved a main character who is a Human Resources consultant. She picks up a strange & lonely man at a hotel bar in Chicago — and he looks familiar, but she can’t place his face at first.
- Maybe she knows him through a organizational development seminar?
- Maybe she interviewed him for a job?
They go back to his hotel room, and it turns out that this strange & random guy is David Duchovny — except it’s David Duchovny in decline, and he doesn’t look anything like Mulder. His career is in the toilet and he can’t get a decent acting job. In my story, he is a sex-addicted alcoholic who is filming a detective show in Chicago.
Hey, what can I say? I’m a GenXer who had has fantasies about bedding Mulder. Don’t judge me!
Anyway, I wrote my story around June 2001 — and then I accepted a job as a Regional HR Manager with Kemper Insurance as punishment for being such a horrible writer. I wonder if I should give up writing, blogging *and* Human Resources — and become a sex addiction therapist?