F@%k It Friday: Worst Weddings


I think that weddings are wasted on the young.

I’ve been to some horrible weddings. Drunk brides. Belligerent grooms. Toasts where the family openly weeps. (You can’t tell if they are moved by the words or weeping for the couple’s future.)


And the drunk family members? Schwoo. Me included. I was once so drunk that I cried in the bathroom of my cousin’s wedding for an hour. My grandmother came in and asked, “Why are you crying?”

I said, “I don’t know.”

Then she left the bathroom with her skirt tucked into her underwear. Someone had been sipping the white wine, too.

I’ve been to weddings where too many uninvited guests show up. Oops. Assumptions were made. And I’ve been to weddings where guests were invited to the reception on the wrong date and almost nobody showed up. I’ve been to weddings where the bride and groom were openly sniping at the reception.

And of course I’ve been to weddings where everyone is in love and everything was beautiful and tasteful.

But that rarely happens.

And the best weddings are second weddings where everything is understated and easy.

What’s the best wedding you’ve attended? And really, who gives a shit — what’s the worst? Did the bride wear white?

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