Holy Crap, 2013 is Half-Over!


laurie in fugly running shortsToday is July 1st. I cannot believe it. The year is half-over.

As I write this blog post, my hair is in a jacked-up French braid and I am wearing a pair of running shorts.

Who the F am I?

I’m not sure. But whoever I am, I better get the hell on board with my life because today starts the first day of my marathon training.

I have always wanted to be a runner. Unfortunately, I would start, falter and hate myself for not being naturally athletic. I would quit running and feel a tremendous amount of shame. Then I would start all over again and think — God dammit, I suck. This isn’t fun. I am fat. I am ugly. I run like a moron. I’m going to fail.

When I failed, I was right.

Around the half-way mark of 2012, I wanted to do things differently. Although I still believe all of those things about myself to be true, I found kindred spirits who also possess a high level of self-loathing. They are good and decent people who don’t always see the goodness and the decency within themselves. And they helped me set some running goals.

(Don’t die. Breathe. Stay upright. Run a 5K in less than 30 minutes.)

A year later, I have achieved some serious wellness goals that have far exceeded anything I could have ever imagined. So I wanted to share with you that the halfway mark in any year is really important. Even though I am cynical and cranky, this is a good time of year to set some private goals. You have six months to feel better about your life.

Want a goal? Let me encourage you to get a little more active.

I know, I know. When you have a busy life — a long commute, snotty kids, an inflexible spouse — it is tough to find time to eat a candy bar, let alone exercise. Five minutes of free time is a luxury. And you’d never wear fugly running shorts.

But I want you to be a normal person, again. I want you to stop being anxious, angry, self-deprecating and slightly neurotic. I want you to stop hating your job. One day, I want you to stop reading my blog and start enjoying your career.

A little physical activity helps.

So I hope you take a mid-year pause and think about getting active. I am a libertarian and your health is your own business; however, I hope you can get off the computer and get back into the real world where you sweat, strain and laugh at yourself a little more.

That is my mid-year wish for you!

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