Off the Grid Fridays—Speeding Tickets (& #SHRMLEAD10)

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I’ve never had a speeding ticket.

I have been pulled over dozens of times but I talk my way out of them by saying, “I don’t know if this will help me or hurt me, but my Mom is a Chicago cop.”

Never.

Not once.

No tickets.

I was totally sweating buckets because I was driving up to Arlington, cruising along at 85 mph, and clocked by a trooper — but he pulled over the guy next to me. Sucker.

I was totally ready to use that line.

I know some of you are repeat offenders. Fess up. Who’s racked up the most moving violations?

PS — here’s the obligatory swag video to explain why I’m in Virginia.

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