Shorten Your Morning Beauty Routine


A good friend of mine told me that it takes her 90 minutes to get ready for work if she wants to look good. That is insane. She has kids. And no job is worth that kind of nonsense.

If I had a real job, this is what I would do.

  1. Find a hairstyle that works without much fuss. So many women look great with short hair but insist on long, stringy hair that is tortured into some sort of style. Others can’t stop messing with their hair and always have the I AM GROWING IT OUT LOOK. Can we all please stop fucking with our hair? Find a style that works. Then get the hell to work. Who cares?
  2. Simplify your skincare routine. So many of us eat like hell, don’t drink enough water and then cake on the foundation. Or we buy expensive skincare products that disappoint us. I always check out before I make an investment in a new skincare product. And FWIW I like Cetaphil. Whenever I deviate from the basics, I regret it.
  3. Skip the heavy make-up. You are lovely and amazing. No matter how good you look, it’s wasted on your stupid coworkers. So get a few extra minutes of sleep and stick with a lip gloss and maybe mascara. The rest is overkill.

The best beauty advice? Sleep, exercise and water. If your job doesn’t allow you to take care of yourself, no amount of primping in the morning will help.

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