Today's Worst Job In The World: Waitress

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Whenever I start to get bummed about working in Corporate Human Resources, I realize that my life could be worse. I could be exposed to skeevy people with poor hygiene and naughty kids. In other words, I could be a waitress server restaurant worker. (What’s the right term, anyway?)

My friend, Sarah, is a member of a Facebook group called SERVERS ARE PEOPLE, TOO. The group’s main page has some information about how you should treat your waiter or waitress. Some highlights:

  • If you have children, DO NOT let them open and dump anything on the table (i.e., salt, sugar, etc.). IF YOU DO, you must leave an extra $5 for the server to clean up YOUR CHILD’S mess & to restock the now unusable and wasted items. The least you can do is pay us for the extra work.
  • If you feel the necessity to stay for longer than 15 minutes after you pay, its an extra $3 every 30 minutes. We make our money from the tables. If you are in one and we can’t seat it, we don’t make money.
  • Telling a server they are the best server they’ve ever had is NOT a tip. If we are good, let us know by leaving us more money. We cant pay our bills on compliments. Its not that we don’t appreciate the praise, its just that if you say that and then leave a shitty tip it’s an insult.
  • Prayer cards and any other religious pamphlets are NOT tips. Jesus doesn’t pay the bills!!

It goes on & on & on like this, which leads me to a simple conclusion: being a waiter or a waitress totally sucks and is today’s worst job in the world.

Well, it’s worse than Corporate Human Resources — and that says something.

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