Years ago, a Human Resources leader gave me this advice.
You don’t have to be right. You just have to be first.
At the time, we were in a room full of crowded executives and board members. We were discussing a weighty issue. Everyone had an opinion. No one wanted to say anything. So my boss spoke up, gave her opinion, and her actions gave everyone in the room permission to speak. And no one really focused on what she said or judged her — she’s right, she’s wrong, she is an idiot – because they all had their own agendas & opinions. They wanted to be heard. They just didn’t want to be first.
I think about this advice all of the time. Whether I am in business meetings or writing a blog post, I have a healthy enough ego to know that my opinions and ideas come from an educated place. I mean well. There’s no malicious intent. If I get it wrong, I am in good company because others are probably thinking what I’m thinking. No one dies if I make a mistake.
And being first to voice an opinion, speak my mind, or share a new idea means that I am almost always at the top of someone’s mind when they eventually need my help. This has been immeasurably important in my career. Because I spoke up at one meeting very early in my HR career, I was asked to take a trip over to Europe to share my thoughts and possibly head up a project that could have been managed by 100 more qualified HR professioanls.
Guess who got that project?
Suddenly I had global responsibilities and was getting to know HR leaders and business country managers — and the ins and outs of works councils — all because I spoke up and established myself as an early favorite in someone’s mind.
So do you have something to say? I think you do. Speak up. Say it. You might be unqualified. You might be wrong. But chances are that no one is paying attention to what you’re saying. They are paying attention to the fact that you said something in the first place.
Remember that you don’t have to be right. You just have to be first.
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This is So True. Well-said, and thanks for the reminder.
Thanks, Simone.
One of the other things that one of my HR Directors told me is ‘you don’t have to know everything, you just have to be half a step in front of everybody else’… It is good advice provided you know exactly where everybody else is…
That is good. I like people who think they are a half-step in front of everybody else. Those people crack me up.
Completely agree. I love the phrase “Fortune favors the bold.”
Also? If you are partly right, being first with an idea/answer that has valid points and is only partly BS gets your foot in the door. Which buys time to find the right answer and/or the right solution.
So true, too….that people are afraid to shape a discussion. No one wants to look like an ass if their idea is completely out of bounds. I’ve been in so many meetings where no one asked even painfully obvious questions.
I don’t mind tap dancing. Really. And my improvising gives other — and brighter — people time to think about the real issue.
Have you ever met one of those people who has an opinion on everything? You start a conversation and they are always first in banging on about this, that or the other, without any sense or thought for the value of their contribution.
How about the one that sits quietly, listens to everything, hears what is being said and then floors the room with a well balanced, intuitive, thought through, intelligent question, answer or contribution?
Which would you rather have on your team?
Of course, the truth is that there is a need for both – those that plant ideas and those that build on them. But if you think that always speaking first and speaking loudest is the key to a successful career then you’re probably better off working for yourself.
Have the courage to speak up. Yes. But also have the courage to say nothing. Especially when you find that you have nothing to say.
Well of course, yes, shut up if your thoughts are pure tosh. But so often we talk ourselves out of being brave because we are afraid.
The brightest person in the room doesn’t always shine. It’s usually the bravest.
Agreed! It is amazing the trust and credibility you can build by speaking up – right or wrong. People tend to realize that you care about the issue(s) and are trying to find solutions — and in turn, become the one they turn to when there are problems to solve. Great advice!!
Great point, Chris!
Bold. That is a path that too many fail to take, because they are waiting for perfection, they are fearful of making a mistake, or waiting for a clue.
Nothing happens without a bold commitment. Once committed, Providence moves to the commitment. A commitment can be as simple as boldly stepping forward and setting an idea out on the table to be maimed and killed, or accepted, modified, and made better. But without the bold commitment to get it started, nothing happens.
The sardonic thinker who sits back and makes the devastating clear remark that makes all others in the room sound like fools? They are not team players. For if they were team players, they would engage and help guide the conversation in the right direction, not deflate the progress being made. I call those people “Dr. No”, for it is often that sardonic player that works over the emotions in the room, thinking of how the comments will throw water on the flames. Dr. No exists in every organization. Think of the last meeting, Dr. No was there – even if he was not in the room, for the spirit of Dr. No is in every meeting.
If you really want to make change happen – you must kill off Dr. No and his influence. The best way, is to do it boldly.
Nice Post Laurie!
Hey, DK.
Listen, I’m not looking for a team player. I’m looking for solutions. And I agree with you that the condescending jerk in the room can go schtuff himself. He’s of no help.
Although I do like the guy who, at the end, points out what everyone has been missing. That’s helpful, too.
The guy who participates throughout that points out the missing piece – well, they are gold. The jerk that kills the ideas – they stand in the way of solutions. In fact, they make ideas harder to make real.
Thanks for the encouragement! Sometimes we get so hung up on trying to say the right thing we don’t say anything.
Speak up!
In a 2011 commencement speech, insurance executive Joe Plumeri told how he got the Sears Tower’s owner to rename the Chicago skyscraper the Willis Tower (after his company), even though he was renting only 2% of the space: “I asked.” http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/12/us/12commencement.html#plumeri
thanks, karl!
I am waiting to read what the other commentors have to say before I weigh in.
ha!
Plus, this is good test of the group you’re meeting with to see what their attitude is toward HR! You’ll either see the conversation pick up, or you’ll get a “know your place” kind of response. I find the latter to be very valuable information! It’s hard to not take that personally, but you really can’t since it really isn’t about you. It’s about the big-headed jerks at the table who treat you that way.
so true. i like hr people get the “know your place” response and ignore it.
Good advice, unless…
You are a top person or very influential. You might shut down others from speaking,
Or if you really don’t have something valuable to say. I’ve seen many Gen X folks speak up early and loudly without having a real opinion and this can hurt their credibility.
But for most I completely agree with you. Often people over think and don’t want to look foolish. If you have an idea share it. Someone has to go first and it might as well be you.
well yes, all good, and sometimes you are the guy who ALWAYS talks and it shuts down conversation because people don’t want to engage you.
Fantastic advice and something I’m working on. I’m no longer scared to speak up!
do it. do it. do it.
Reminds me of: “In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king.”
That’s very proverbsy.
Yes, I think the simple sound of a voice can shake the nervousness off of the rest of the crowd. But I also received some advice that’s on the flip side of this opinion.
Early on in my career a very important potential client pulled me aside after a pitch session. He was clearly annoyed and told me there were several people that he did not want attending any future meetings with his company. (This list included our then president!) The client said he wanted me in all future meetings because I was the only one in the room who didn’t feel like they had to “pull every club out of their golf bag” to prove how important and smart they were.
I was a recent college grad, and little did potential client know but I was in so far over my head in the meeting that I could barely follow the conversation.
Sometimes just taking it in is also a good idea.
Very good.
Yes, first with the solution wins. There may be edits to your solution, but b business is all about solving problems.
We get paid for discomfort and to solve probs.
I have worked for several small companies over the course of my career. The great thing about working at a small startup is, you get involved in every part of the business. I have an IT background, but I got to work with sales and marketing all the time. Having a very collaborative environment like that was really beneficial.
We all had a different perspective and a different background, because of that we were able to come up with some really innovative ideas. If I had a problem with a product we were developing, someone from sales might throw out an off the wall suggestion that I would never have considered. Sure, there were a lot of instances where their idea wouldn’t work, but there were a number of times that it really opened my eyes to an entirely new way of doing things.
I definitely agree with Marsha on this one: the one with the first solution wins. Go ahead and put the idea out there even if you don’t think it’s quite right. Everything will stem off of your main idea if they take the bait.
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